Pushing the velvet curtains aside, I threw the door open with iPod in one hand and rubbish in the other. Among the various types of packaging in the bag were egg shells, onion skin, and the top clover bit of a tasteless tomato I disposed of last night for my customary omelette. Nothing like eggs with buttered toast and ketchup wolved down while reading a trashy novel.
The air outside was disappointingly uncrisp, overpowered by the heavy scent of the dregs of stale curry on the top, then immediately overpowered by the smell of porkolt being cooked somewhere on the third floor. The flowers in front of the flat opposite me were picture pretty against the white walls, the violet, fuchsia, buttercup yellow petals similar to the ones from my childhood that smelled of cow shit. Inside, the old lady with the toupee who waters them was probably fussing over her overfed grandson who stuffs his mountainbike into the lift while she looks on in concern. This is the same flat from which we are occasionally treated to a monologue of every imaginable combination of swear words, along the lines of you motherfucking cunt bitch - one side of a perpetually angry phone call.
The Big Brother flat downstairs looked empty - no girl with her hair in a towel napping on the sofa, or tall dude in a football jersey fiddling with his gadgets. It's better at night, when there are people at home and the darkness of the courtyard frames their bare windows like a living room and tv. Once, when I was smoking outside, I was watching the dude watching tv, and then he freaked me out by swivelling his chair to face me squarely to watch me leaning against the wall. As when I heard the blue streak screaming from the flat opposite, I quickly extinguished and exited back into my heavily curtained flat.
The curtain followed me out of the flat and lodged itself between the doors, so I had to set the rubbish down to close them properly. Except that I set it at the wrong angle, and lunged forward in scooping motion to prevent the curry from splodging onto the ochre tiles peppered with sand from the upstairs neighbour's potted plants. I succeeded, and smeared my white iPod instead. Sharon Jones saw what had transpired and sang
just doing the *syncopated beat* Dap Dip as the song made its horizontol way across the curry screen.